Essential Skills That You'll Need To Becoming More Likeable
2014.01.27
Everyone wants to be liked, even the people who swear they don't care. But for those of us who suck at small talk, the first five minutes of meeting someone new can be pretty nerve-wracking.
But even if you are a little shy or insecure, you really shouldn't let it hold you back from making new friends. If you're looking for a couple of pointers on how to become more likeable, keep scrolling:
Lose the 'Power Pose'
Standing tall, squaring your shoulders, and striding purposefully forward is a great display of nonverbal self-confidence. But it can also make you come across as though you're trying to establish your importance, which can seem a little intimidating.
The next time you meet someone, focus on being more relaxed. Smile and tilt your head towards them slightly when engaging in conversation This will help you appear to be more approachable.
Embrace the power of touch
Touching helps to break down natural barriers, decreasing the real and perceived
distance between you and the other person, which is a key component in liking and
in being liked. Even a simple touch (of the nonsexual variety, of course) can really work wonders in influencing behavior and increasing the chances of compliance.
Since the goal is to appear attractive and friendly, stick with simple things like patting the other person lightly on the upper arm or shoulder while talking with them. Remember to keep things casual and nonthreatening to avoid sending out the wrong signals.
Master the art of Social Jiu-Jitsu
Social Jiu-Jitsu is best described as the art of getting the other person to talk about themselves without them realizing what happened. And it's easier once you realize that most people really like talking about themselves. As soon as you learn a little about someone, get inquisitive by asking open-ended questions.
Be genuine
When it comes to meeting with someone knew, practicing a little humility can really go a long way. So how can you balance promoting yourself while avoiding coming off as a braggart? Be complimentary. Be impressed. Admit a
failing or a weakness. And don't be afraid to show a little vulnerability.
Ask for nothing
Remarkably likeable people focus on what they can do for you—not for themselves. So until you really get to know the other person, try to keep the
hard-charging, goal-oriented, always-on kinda persona in check. But if you do have to ask for something, try to find a way to help the other person first before asking if you can. "Close" genuinely
While making a great first impression is important, making a great last impression also counts. When parting, shake hands while using your other free hand to
gently touch the other person's forearm or shoulder. Instead of sticking with "Nice to meet you," try saying "I am really
glad I met you." or "You know, I really enjoyed talking with you." Then finish it off with a genuine, appreciative smile.
Change is hard, but it's definitely worth it
If you're determined on putting yourself out there and meeting more people, then you need to start accepting the fact that it's going to take a lot of work. Sure it might seem scary, but if you focus on helping people feel a little better about themselves, then they'll definitely like you for it. And who knows, you'll probably end up liking yourself a little more, too.
But even if you are a little shy or insecure, you really shouldn't let it hold you back from making new friends. If you're looking for a couple of pointers on how to become more likeable, keep scrolling:
Lose the 'Power Pose'
Standing tall, squaring your shoulders, and striding purposefully forward is a great display of nonverbal self-confidence. But it can also make you come across as though you're trying to establish your importance, which can seem a little intimidating.The next time you meet someone, focus on being more relaxed. Smile and tilt your head towards them slightly when engaging in conversation This will help you appear to be more approachable.
Embrace the power of touch
Touching helps to break down natural barriers, decreasing the real and perceived
distance between you and the other person, which is a key component in liking and
in being liked. Even a simple touch (of the nonsexual variety, of course) can really work wonders in influencing behavior and increasing the chances of compliance. Since the goal is to appear attractive and friendly, stick with simple things like patting the other person lightly on the upper arm or shoulder while talking with them. Remember to keep things casual and nonthreatening to avoid sending out the wrong signals.
Master the art of Social Jiu-Jitsu
Social Jiu-Jitsu is best described as the art of getting the other person to talk about themselves without them realizing what happened. And it's easier once you realize that most people really like talking about themselves. As soon as you learn a little about someone, get inquisitive by asking open-ended questions. Be genuine
When it comes to meeting with someone knew, practicing a little humility can really go a long way. So how can you balance promoting yourself while avoiding coming off as a braggart? Be complimentary. Be impressed. Admit a
failing or a weakness. And don't be afraid to show a little vulnerability. Ask for nothing
Remarkably likeable people focus on what they can do for you—not for themselves. So until you really get to know the other person, try to keep the
hard-charging, goal-oriented, always-on kinda persona in check. But if you do have to ask for something, try to find a way to help the other person first before asking if you can. "Close" genuinely
While making a great first impression is important, making a great last impression also counts. When parting, shake hands while using your other free hand to
gently touch the other person's forearm or shoulder. Instead of sticking with "Nice to meet you," try saying "I am really
glad I met you." or "You know, I really enjoyed talking with you." Then finish it off with a genuine, appreciative smile.Change is hard, but it's definitely worth it
If you're determined on putting yourself out there and meeting more people, then you need to start accepting the fact that it's going to take a lot of work. Sure it might seem scary, but if you focus on helping people feel a little better about themselves, then they'll definitely like you for it. And who knows, you'll probably end up liking yourself a little more, too.More Articles
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