20 Questions Married Couples Are Sick of Hearing
2014.07.12
Married people get asked a lot of questions. And most of them are god-awful ones. Why can't people think of other things to ask, like, where would you like to go for dessert for example. Instead, most married people are bombarded with questions like the ones below. Sometimes, they come from other married couples.
Erm..just like any other we guess? Do you hate your life? We think you do.
You want us to say no. Just say it.
This must be the most boring question on planet Earth.
Pretty great actually. It fits!
Define pants.
Is there anything else you can't ask?
Seriously, are you kidding?
Just be a fly and begone now.
Is that question rhetorical?
Hell yes, can't you see my big fat smile?
If I was this guy from Glee? YES.
Let me think..
Okay, super rude person with super rude question.
Yes, we also shower, sleep, eat, breathe and do everything in front of each other.
Well, yes of course. Isn't that what a marriage means?
Oh, now you tell me!
See my eyes roll, bitch!
You must be really jealous to ask me that.
What really is your question here?
So you want to know our life history. Sure. Do you have 10 years to spare?
1. So how's married life?
Erm..just like any other we guess? Do you hate your life? We think you do.
2. Do you guys have more sex now that you're married?
You want us to say no. Just say it.
3. Do you have lots of couple friends these days?
This must be the most boring question on planet Earth.
4. How's the ball and chain doing?
Pretty great actually. It fits!
5. Who wears the pants in the family?
Define pants.
6. When's the baby coming?
Is there anything else you can't ask?
7. Are you guys planning for a baby yet?
Seriously, are you kidding?
8. When is number 2 coming?
Just be a fly and begone now.
9. Do you hate your in-laws?
Is that question rhetorical?
10. Are you happy?
Hell yes, can't you see my big fat smile?
11. If you could have a do-over, would you?
If I was this guy from Glee? YES.
12. Do you need a visa to go out?
Let me think..
13. So who makes more money?
Okay, super rude person with super rude question.
14. Do you pee in front of each other?
Yes, we also shower, sleep, eat, breathe and do everything in front of each other.
15. Do you have to run everything by your wife?
Well, yes of course. Isn't that what a marriage means?
16. Isn't it scary to know you're going to grow old with someone forever?
Oh, now you tell me!
17. How do you feel about divorce?
See my eyes roll, bitch!
18. Don't you wish you were single sometimes?
You must be really jealous to ask me that.
19. Do you do everything together?
What really is your question here?
20. How long have you been together?
So you want to know our life history. Sure. Do you have 10 years to spare?
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