The night is finally calm. The baby is sound asleep. You and your wife have that look in your eyes. Yes, you're both horny. You start with foreplay. The kisses intensify, and your breathing gets erotically heavier. Things heat up fast. Then, all of a sudden, you hear the shrieks of a crying baby from the room next door. Does this sound like your life? 

You're not alone. It happens. A lot. To everyone. All the time. And it also has something to do with science. According to one study, babies cry at night time to prevent their mother from procreating. This increases their chances of survival.

Professor David Haig at Harvard University published the study in the "Evolution, Medicine and Public Health" journal. He found that babies wake up frequently, even if they are not hungry to prolong her lactational amenorrhea, a pattern found in breast-fed infants.

Yup. Your baby doesn't want you to bone because he or she wants to delay the birth of a younger sibling. This becomes more apparent when the frequency of intense nursing happening at night. Baby wants mommy and it doesn't intend to share her.

But will your baby really be feeding in the wee of the night? Or is it just comfort suckling? The study also notes that as babies get older, their stomachs become bigger, being able to accommodate more milk; hence not really needing to wake up to feed. They can actually just sleep through the night.

A crying baby is difficult to ignore, so no one should fault the other for coitus interruptus. All we know is that having a baby in the house can definitely cramp your sexual style. Yet, finding the time to express your love and connect with your partner is important. So what should you do?

Here are some pro-tips we've collected from several new, and experienced, parents on how to get around to completing the deed:

1. Do it during the day

Naptime nooky time: the 20 minute window you have when your baby knocks off for some siesta after his noon feed. Do it now. Or book the next nap slot available 2 to 3 hours later.

2. Get creative. You don't need a bed.

It seriously doesn't need to be in your bedroom. You have the couch, kitchen counter, storeroom, and bathroom. Who says you need a bed? It could also be kinky doing it in every corner of your home.

3. You don't need to go all the way either.

Foreplay isn't totally necessary. Passionate kissing works to switch on the happy juices. Try that. And if you're too tired or have no time to finish, then at least you've had your bonding session. Take care of yourself after.

4. Book a dirty weekend away.

Make it quick, dirty, and most importantly...sexy! You don't need to book a holiday on a faraway island. You could just check into a hotel in town, as long as you've arranged for someone to watch over the little tyke while you're away.

Alas, your problems don't quite end there though. When they grow up, there's the dreaded "walk in" that may one day traumatize your kid, AND YOU (from embarrassment), like this commercial below:



Good luck, folks.

[Independent]